May 14, 2009

I appreciate you need to make money, but ....

I don't know what it's like in other parts of sunny South Africa, but here in the Eastern Cape, specifically Port Elizabeth, we have a huge quantity of parking guards. Now, I'm the first to applaud people for trying to make an honest living, and I do understand that a lot of these people have completed courses and are with legitimate companies. But then you get the other bunch, those people that find themselves a luminous waste coat and hound you in every parking lot in town.

Please tell me dude with an orange waste coat, how do you know more about driving than me? In the 10 years I have been driving, I have never managed to reverse into anyone. I have three, yes count them, one, two, three, mirrors in my vehicle which help me see what is happening behind me. I have this amazing ability to turn to look and my blind spot, and see if there are any cars approaching, or reversing at the same time. I also have sensors. You see, it's this nifty little invention that picks up anything in close proximity to the back of my vehicle, and sets off an alarm inside the compartment. The closer the obstruction, the louder the noise, and the fact that you refuse to move further than 3 meters from the rear bumper of my vehicle, is making the sensors go off, extremely loud and extremely fast, thus causing me to brake, which in turn is causing a hold up in traffic. I have to tell you, I am tempted to put my car in reverse and ignore the sensors, just to see how quickly you can get out of the way. I appreciate that you have been "watching" my vehicle, but I highly doubt that out of 50 odd vehicles in this parking lot, that you would be able to pin point which one is mine. I would also like to know what you plan on doing should anyone break into my vehicle? Perhaps blow on them with your last nights booze breath? And for this you expect me to pay you? You have caused me nothing but frustration and time wastage. Seriously guy, I can drive better than you, and I promise I don't need your help!

5 comments:

Zeu said...

Hey! Would you know their cousins are here in Benoni?! What the hell man!

I do have sympathy for them but I agree, we have the mirrors, the license, the turnable heads, the sensors and oh yes at a Mininmum fee of 399 Rands a month we also have tracking which they only do till the first turn.

OH and the nasty in me, asks them to Identify my car when I come back. If you don't know you don't get. Sorry for you!
(Insensitive I know - another bad trait revealed)

Martie xxx said...

Oh man, they irritate the crap out of me!

You know what i did when I was 39 weeks preggo?
The guy grabbed my trolley and wanted to take it to the car (WHICH HE DIDNT KNOW WHICH ONE!!!!) and I told him to piss off. Then he showed me how to reverse and I DROVE INTO HIM. Yip, you read it, i just carried on and then drove off.

IF YOU WANT TO TELL ME HOW TO DRIVE I WILL DRIVE OVER YOU!!!! Biatch!

Paula said...

And in Joburg! Ug I get so irritated I can scream. I have a rule, if the guy at least offers to pick up my freaken double stroller I will give him something, if not then no. Also this one memorable time, one actually held his umbrella over Rachel while I was putting Olivia in the car. He did get something too!

Rentia said...

LOL they are like rabbits, all over the place.

I also ask them when I get back which car is mine and most of them can't remember.

Sheez.

XXX

Irene said...

I know the feeling - not so bad though since I left Jhb.
I agree that if I am walking to my car with a full trolley and they take the trolley from me and offer to pack all the bags they will definately get something but if they stand back and watch me do it then come running to take the empty trolley after the fact they get sweet blow-all.