I took the day off yesterday. Jordan's teeth have been causing ear and attitude problems, and I have a bout of flu. I had planned to go and see family at 10:30, knowing that he goes down for his nap between 9 and 10. This left plenty of time for me to shower and pack his day bag before he woke up. When I was still sitting around at 9:45 watching my offspring have sporadic bouts of giggling whilst playing peek - a - boo from under his duvet, I got to thinking how kids always seem to know what you've planned and always put a spanner in the works.
My Mom always said she didn't need contraceptives; she had 3 kids. The all day flirting and suggestive foreplay usually ended in nothing, with the "coupe de grande" being foiled by a teenager blasting incomprehensible music or some sibling argument of monumental, earth shattering proportions, or worse... all of the above. A family member told me how her brother had run into his parents bedroom one Sunday during nap time, jumped on his Father's back mid stride and screamed in absolute delight; "I ride horsy too". A real passion killer. Or, when I had phoned one of my friends and was told by her then 4 year old son, that Mommy was otherwise predisposed due to "Daddy talking to Mommy's mick right now". I myself have had my step son standing at our door one night when we thought he was fast asleep, extremely concerned because we were breathing far to deeply, and surely we must be ill.
Although we all sit and laugh at these situations now, one has to wonder how they knew. What 6th sense they were born with in order to somehow pick up on the impending future, and at what point they lose this ability.
Indeed, kids are born with a psychic gift, an ability to know what their parents have planned, and an acute covert ability to masterfully move between rooms without our knowledge, and like those Ninjas in corny B grade movies, appear from the corners and pounce when we least expect.
I will leave you with something my step son said once. "Ma... kids know stuff"!