February 19, 2010

The Long and the short of it...

My blog is going to change, it's going to morph, and quite possibly it is not going to be the happy space it once was, all the time.

This last week I've had to imagine my life without my other half, about the uncertainty of life and how quickly it can be cut short.

I've learned that a single mother is an amazing creature, that one copes when they have to, and that you can in deed cry every night. That empty bed syndrome is very real, that the state of our Government Hospitals is so shocking that it's difficult to comprehend. That a child misses his father, even when he cannot speak and that your heart can break by looking at an X Ray. I've seen that I can be more angry than I ever imagined and that you can only bargain with God for so long before you no longer believe.

This week I've had to imagine my life without my husband, and the uncertainty of how long his life will be...

11 comments:

Evelyn said...

I am so sorry that this is happening Nix. Please know that I am here for you. I mean it. Do you have some sort of a support structure?

I am praying for you and family

x x x

Mandri said...

I'm so sorry Nix! Please know that we will carry on praying!

Adéle said...

Lord please be with Nikki, Jordan and her DH in this difficult time.

Melanie said...

I am sorry, really I am! I pray that God will be with you, Jordan & your DH in this difficult time! **HuGs**

xx

Marie-L said...

Thats what friends are for honey, to follow your blog and support throughout happy and sad times. Praying that things will get better, and that you and your family will fin comfort and strength

Monzelle de Villiers said...

BIG BIG HUGS from me to you! May the Lord comfort you in the time you have ahead, whatever it may entail. I pray for strength and peace. I pray for you to rise above this, for you all to get through whatever it is, stronger than you were when this journey started.

We are all here for you, know that...

Tamara said...

I am so sorry :(

Praying for you and your family in this difficult time my friend.
If there is anything I can do please let me know !

Hugs xxx

Mandy said...

Ah Nix, my heart bleeds for you. Anyone who knows you can see how much you love Syd, and pray each and every day that he will heal and that his life will be spared so that you can have many happy years to come. Jordan is such a lovely boy and he deserves to know his father, so I pray that this is just a scare and that the doctors will find a way to cure him. May God carry you through this time and give you the strength to bear with it all. It's in these dark times that we often feel God closest to us. So even if you feel alone and scared, please know that God is still there.

theclam said...

Nix, I have not commented here for a long time but always read when you update. I do not know what is going on right now but please know that whatever it is I am praying for you and your DH and your son to have many, many long years ahead.

xxx

Natalie said...

Big hugs

xxx

darcie said...

I'm new here - a friend of mine stumbled upon your blog and shared it...
I just want you to know that you are being thought of, prayed for, loved.
xoxo